Purple Donkeys
by Rainbow Dust
Summary: MarlenexSirius oneshot. All Sirius wants is just one date with Marlene McKinnon, but she'd rather eat soap than go out with him.


**A/N: So Marlene and Sirius deserve some fluffiness, don't they? After all the angst I have put them through in like... all of my fan fictions? Some fluff might not kill them .. well it isn't even really "fluff" its more.. humor-ish, but it is NOT angst... I should get an award for this!**

**Oh, and yes I had SIRIUS name problems for the fic I was like... Shoe? Bored? MRAH? So, I ended up with purple donkeys.. No, I am not weird!**

Purple Donkeys

~ Sirius Black & Marlene McKinnon ~

"I am bored." Sirius said and fell down on the couch next to James, who didn't even look up from his letter.

"I am bored." Sirius announced again, but again nothing happened.

"I am bored." this time he looked over at Remus who sat across him, but did nothing.

"_I am bored! I am bored! I am, I am, I am bored, I am bored, I am BORED!_"

With a sigh, Remus finally looked up from his book and James put the letter back on the table.

"What's up Sirius?" the dark haired boy asked with a silent laugh.

"I-" Sirius growled "am-" another growl.

"A dog?"

"BORED."

Remus sighed. "We noticed."

"Can we _dooo _something," Sirius whined.

"Why don't you find someone to _do._" James asked with a smirk and Sirius gritted his teeth together.

"Everyone is at fucking Hogsmeade! But we can't go to Hogsmeade no cus someone spit or something into Minnie's breakfast and now she's all -"

"We get it ." Remus laughed. "We cannot go to Hogsmeade."

Sirius narrowed his eyes "Well we _could _get to Hogsmeade but suddenly you two are all for "following the rules" and _not _following the Marauder map!"

Remus rolled his eyes. "Why don't you take a walk around the castle or something, find someone to hang out with?"

"EVERYONE IS AT FREAKING HOGSMEADE!" Sirius boomed.

"Not Marlene McKinnon." piped James up and leaned back on the couch, his shaggy haired best friend froze before he slowly turned around to face him.

"She and Lily were planning for the Halloween party, so neither of them went."

Sirius held up a finger at his best friend "Uuuh, Gazillion questions here!"

"Ask away." James laughed.

"1. Why are you sitting here if Lily Evans is around? Aren't you still hopelessly in love with her?"

"I am. I just needed to read my letter."

"2. WHY DID YOU NOT TELL ME THIS BEFORE?"

"... Sorry?"

Sirius growled.

"You know Sirius." Remus said with a laugh "Those were not "gazillion" questions."

James laughed "Oh Moony, he forgot all the questions by the sound of her name." he mocked a sweet voice and put his hand to his heart. "Marlene McKinnon!"

* * *

><p>"Proooooongs," Sirius whined again.<p>

"You know Moony." James whispered to his friend "Padfoot is _siriusly _whiney today."

"I hear that!" Sirius accused "Now Tell me where we can find McKinnon and Evans,"

James rolled his eyes and pulled up the Marauders map "Library, _of course._"

"Tell me again -" said Remus "Why we have to go find them?"

"Well Sirius was bored -"

"_Is _bored!" Corrected Sirius.

"- and then we wanted to find something to make us unbored -"

"And stalking Marlene and Lily is the answer to that?" Remus asked.

"I don't do "stalking"" Sirius growled out. "Thats all James, I'm just bored and maybe McKinnon will be into.. _unboring _me." he wiggled his eyebrows causing his friends to groan out in disgust.

"Pad, after all this time.. Nah, I don't think so."

"We used to snog all the time in fifth year!" Sirius said and crossed his arms.

"Yeah, that was in fifth year, now its seventh year.."

"Exactly, she has had a whole year to miss my sexiness."

With another eye roll and a sigh, Remus spoke "Well we're here," he pointed towards the Library "Are you really going in on that suicide mission Sirius?"

Sirius smirked and walked into the Library ignoring Remus' question.

The Library was mostly empty, except for few second years, everyone else was at Hogsmeade. But there on one table in the front, sitting with her back to the boys was Marlene McKinnon, Lily Evans sitting across from her.

After few seconds Lily looked up and scowled.

James grinned as he walked towards them, Sirius and Remus rolling their eyes behind him as they followed.

"Great." Lily groaned and closed her book so she could cross her arms over her chest.

"What?" asked the blonde and looked at her friend.

"Lily flower!" James exclaimed.

"Oh... Potter." laughed Marlene and turned around, but she froze in her steps as she noticed who was with him.

"Marlene, Lily," greeted Remus awkwardly.

"Evans. _McKinnon._" smirked SIrius.

"Hello Remus," Marlene gave the light haired boy a smile and then scowled at his friend. "Black."

"Aw," Sirius put a hand to his heart "I don't get a sweet hello like Remmie?"

"Nope."

"You hurt my heart,"

"Hows that possible? You don't have a heart."

"Ouch, the gloves have really come off haven't they McKinnon? I never knew you were one for rough words.. I can show you another kind of roughness - Ouch!" Sirius grasped his head and then bent down to grab the shoe that the blonde had thrown at him.

"Go to hell Black." Marlene said before she stood up and went to grab her shoe but he held it up in the air so it was impossible for her to get it.

"Give me the fucking shoe back Black."

"Watch your mouth McKinnon," Sirius smirked. "Do I need to clean it for you?"

"And how would you do that?"

"Well my tongue could -"

"If your mouth came anywhere close to mine it would probably just make it dirtier." Marlene spat out.

"Well If I remember correctly my mouth has been plenty close to yours -"

"And I'd rather eat soap than to do that again. Now give me my shoe."

"Maybe if you kiss me."

"Did you not get my soap thing?"

"You know what? I'll give you your shoe -"

"Thank you!" Marlene said and went to grab the shoe but he moved his hand again.

"But ..."

"But?" she scowled. "No "buts" this is my shoe -"

"You threw it at me McKinnon."

She scowled again "Fine. What do you want?"

"Is "You" an answer good enough?"

"Its a "non qualifying" answer."

"Go out with me."

"Purple donkeys have been found on the school yard!"

Sirius raised his eyes at her comment. "What?"

"Oh sorry I thought we were trying to find who could come up with the most _stupid, ridiculous, never-going-to-happen _thing, but I've got to say, you still win."

"Merlin, why do you have to be this annoying McKinnon? Just say yes, one date with me can't kill you, and you get your shoe."

"What about I say no and you hand me my shoe?"

"Tell me how I get you to say yes."

"I'd rather eat soap remember."

"So if I make you eat soap you'll go with me?"

Marlene stomped her foot. "No!"

Sirius sighed "You know, we can do this all day, just say freaking yes."

"You can't tell me what to say! If I don't want to go out with you -"

"But you _do._"

Sirius sighed and pulled up his wand.

"What are you going to do now Black? Hex me until I say yes?"

But he didn't point his wand at her but pointed it at the Library window and muttered something under his breath.

"What did you do?" Marlene asked, her eyebrow raising as she hurried towards the window and looked out.

"Oh my fucking god!"

"Now you'll say yes?" Sirius asked coming up behind her and also looking out at his _masterpiece_.

On the school yard three purple donkeys now stood and looked around.

"You have gone mad!" Marlene shook her head and then suddenly, she had jumped him, her tiny legs wrapping them selves around his waist and her ruby colored lips making contact with his faded red ones.

He was shocked at first but he was Sirius Black after all so it only took him a second to recover, he pulled her closer and wrapped his arms around her body as he kissed her eagerly back.

And then suddenly, the petite blonde grasped for her shoe and then jumped of him.

"What the hell?" Sirius choked up.

"One date." she told him before she spun around and walked away.

"What the hell was that?" asked James coming up behind him.

"See Prongs, she agreed."

Remus laughed at his friend "Sirius, she only agreed because of the shoe -"

Sirius held his empty hands in the air "Put oh Remmers, she already has the shoe." he laughed and shook his head as he all but skipped out of the Library leaving James and Remus speechless staring after him.

**... Review?**


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